Money Down the Drain

Guess where I've been?....no?....buying booze?...yep...How'd you guess?...I went on my bi-weekly field trip after work to go stock up on a few bottles of Scotch, and 12 or so bottles of wine....if you buy 12 or more bottles of wine, you can get the "case discount"...."What's wrong with that?", you may ask....well, it takes me TWO AND A HALF HOURS round trip to get my booze....see, for those of you who don't live down South, I live in a "dry county"...what that means is, you cannot buy Liquor or Wine in this county...or the SURROUNDING counties, for that matter...as a result, I have to drive to the outskirts of Knoxvegas to buy a bottle of Scotch, and some Chianti....now, we don't have extravagant tastes...the bottles of wine that I buy are in the $10 to $17 dollar range...and a 1/2 gallon of cheap Scotch, and 2 bottles of Single Malt Scotch are also on the purchase list......the Malts are for drinking first, and then the cheaper stuff is for a bit later in the evenings when the taste buds are sizzled....

What ranks me is this...just because I have to drive nearly 3 bloody hours to get my booze will NOT make me swear off drinking....it will NOT "reform" me...it will NOT make me drink less....what it WILL DO is make me spend $250 to $300 bucks every two weeks in a COUNTY OTHER THAN MY OWN....now, tell me what good that does for our inpoverished county? eh?...Not a DAMN thing....and trust me, good people...I ain't alone....there are LOTS of people who go up to Knoxville to buy it, and drive back home to enjoy it...

People, I think we are missing the boat here....I would love to be able to spend that money here in my county....and why shouldn't I? Surely that money could be used to upkeep our roads, ensure the schools don't fall down, or whatever....nope...instead, Knox County gets my money....and I suppose it is going to stay that way for the forseeable future....

by Eric on December 02, 2003 | Comments(11) | SWG Stories
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Comments so far:

Hiya!

Yea, I lived in a couple of dry counties in KY and it did suck. I could not get used to the hours when you could vs. could not buy either.

In AZ, even the grocery stores and some gas stations sell Single Malt. Your taste in adult beverages of choice parallel my own.

/peace

posted by: Yandy on December 2, 2003 06:31 PM

My experience has been that dry counties are where you find the best moonshiners. I'm in a dry district in Dallas, but I can go 10 minutes away, cross the tracks (literally) and buy all the booze I want. That's too close for good shine.

posted by: Phelps on December 2, 2003 06:47 PM

yeah, Phelps, but the shiners and the bootleggers don't have Single Malt...sure, if I wanted "Ole Grandad", and the wife wanted "Mad Dog 20/20", then we'd be great...but, other than having good shine, they don't have a very wide selection..

posted by: Eric on December 2, 2003 06:56 PM

When we going camping bro.

posted by: ken on December 2, 2003 08:32 PM

You obviously don't understand, Eric. If we sell liquor by the bottle in our county, we'll all be on the greased-up slide to Hell. I mean, the Religious right can trust themselves....they just can't trust any of us.

I mean, haven't you noticed how the county's gone to the dogs since Applebee's was allowed to serve liquor by the drink?!?!?!

;)

posted by: BSTommy on December 2, 2003 10:37 PM

Dry county(ies)? Three-hour drive to buy booze?? What kind of nimrod dreamed up that swell idea? I would farookin' M O V E !!!!!!

posted by: Parkway Rest Stop on December 2, 2003 10:53 PM

Defy all attempts at "social" or "behavioral" engineering. Keep laws basic and simple, and leave us the fuck alone. Freedom is the only true order, and rational self interest and self governance the only true morality. Drink up, my friend, and live life to the fullest.

Werbinox

posted by: werbinox on December 2, 2003 11:56 PM

i member when they wuz fussin n fitin bout whuther ye wood be able to git 'likker by the drank' in knoxvull. tuck a long time to git it. lots of folks wuz arguin that ifn k-town hadda gut likker by the drank earlier in its histry, it could have been more importunt than atlanta since it had the two interstate hiways cumin together thar n the tennessee river n all. in sted, twuz debated fer a few decades n folks kep drivin south to stay in atlanta in sted of tennessee.

meanwhile, i kep on a drankin but i dint go to restrunts as much as i wooda lacked.

dont seem to me lack ye kin engineer moralty with laws.

posted by: buddy don on December 3, 2003 07:00 AM

A'men, Buddy Don...

posted by: Eric on December 3, 2003 07:01 AM

I've never been in a "dry" county where I couldn't buy anything I wanted, as long as I knew the right people.

posted by: Acidman on December 3, 2003 07:04 AM

Acidman: We must have a the only bootlegger in the whole damn South who doesn't have Scotch on the menu....

Ken: Anytime you're in the area, just give me a call.

posted by: Eric on December 3, 2003 07:07 AM