Redneck Wisdom...

...more on the lighning ride to Nashville.... we took one of my Bro's friends to see him... Charlie.. now, I've known Charlie since he was 6... he hasn't changed much over the years.. I went to school with his big Sister... anyway, he's an incredible wit, and as "country" as is humanly possible.. his dry humor and satire made the trip fly by... and, during our ride, he said two things to me which I feel compelled to share...

"I was a'watchin' on the teevee the other day that Deeerector of the FBI.. and he sayud - 'Even though we've spent 5 Billion dollars on Homeland Security, the likely hood of theyum terrorists to pull off nuther attack as big as 9/11 still exists'.... well, hell-far.... iffin that's the case, theyun, I want my money back, dammit"

...and...

"whut I want is to feel safe in my own home... an' ta tell ya the truth, I don't... every Summer, I'm afreared to get out of my damn house....you want to fight terrorists? hell, I am terrorized every Spring... I'm terrorized enough to not want to leave my house... the guys are vicious... deadly.... fanatical... well armed... and are already in your country by the millions.. you want to make me feel safe from terrorists? OK, then, what I want to know is why we can't spend a few Billion on gettin' rid of all these dadburn mosquitoes..."

....I have to admit, when he first started the mosquito rant, I thought the punchline was going to be IRS Agents... heh... he's a one-of-akind.. and, trust me... that's a good thing... he probably should have a blog... but, he'd need to get a computer first..

by Eric on February 29, 2004 | Comments(2) | SWG Stories

Comments so far:

Well people a lot smarter then us banned DDT ages ago because of some flimsy science and alleged damage to raptor eggshell's thickness.

So ever since then millions of people are dead now because of mosquito-borne illness (hello, West Nile disease) but the Greenies can sleep safely at night. Unless there is a mosquito in their bedroom at which point they pull out every manner of pesticide you can still legally purchase and procede to empty into the confined space of their home while muttering under their (labored) breath "there should be some kind of pesticide that kills these damn things!"

posted by: Neo on February 29, 2004 11:31 AM

Ah yes, Neo. I remember it well. Even remember the hoards of kids who ran behind the DDT foggers, having great fun. Most of those kids who weren't killed in Nam are still with us - with apparently no residual DDT damage. Like you said, the mosquito boom has done the damage.

posted by: Indigo on February 29, 2004 01:11 PM