Just off I-75....

...as I was on my way to Nashville yesterday, I pulled off I-75 at the Lenoir City exit.. I had felt the need for a chili-cheese pup from the Krystal there, as you do....

...well, I'm sitting there waiting for traffic to clear so I can cross the road, when I suddenly notice a huge billboard... with two lonely, but highly offensive words on it...


..right there.. on the side of the I-75... what a load of shit... I immediately yelled, "BITE ME, you Bastard!"... to which, my Mother... who was sitting in the passenger seat watching traffic.. said... "Pardon!?", in quite a genteel Southern Lady kinda way...... "Just look at that billboard.." I said.... "Who in the hell do these people think they are?"... She grinned, and replied... "Well, people who smoke DO have a different smell about them..."..... "Well, Mom.. there IS a difference... I mean... what if I put up a billboard that said something like... 'Chocolate Milk Drinkers are Ugly'... eh, what would you think about that?"

... anyway, you get the point... opinions are opinions... and, billboards should be used to advertise the location of the nearest McDonalds... and NOT to voice some closet Nazi's opinions...

...when I finally arrived at the Krystal, I couldn't even enjoy my Chili-cheese Pup... damn, I was mad....

...I am seriously thinking of renting the billboard next to it.. and posting my own message... but, I am torn between... "BITE Me"... "SHUT UP"... and, "Come over HERE and say that, you pathetic little Nazi..."

...I mean, c'mon.. how much could it cost to rent that billboard?... of course, if I DID put up a billboard saying something like.. "Hippies Smell", I'd be run out of town on a rail, I suppose... but, it is ok for those same smelly Hippies to tell Me that I STINK?... fuck them... cowardly little bastards...

by Eric on April 25, 2004 | Comments(10) | Psycho Rants
Technicalities links with: Linky Luv

Comments so far:

Oh My GODDESS, I love Krystals!!! And, I hate to say it, but I have to agree with the billboard. Please, I beg you, don't flog me! That nasty habit killed my father, and will most likely kill my mother, so as you can imagine, my convictions run deep.

Now, whether or not YOU personally stink remains to be seen, err, sniffed; but alas, I digress. LOL.

posted by: Asherah on April 25, 2004 05:18 PM

I'll pitch in on the billboard. I really will...

posted by: Sam on April 25, 2004 05:40 PM

..sorry, Asherah, I didn't mean to offend.... but.... it is not a question of if smoking is bad, or not... the question is, what right does someone renting billboard space have to tell me that I stink.. when, of course, I dont.. heh... the Wife thinks I smell quite nice... people who assume to tell others what to think, or do, or shame them in some way, are wrong on a basic, ethical level... live, and let live, baby... that's the ticket...

..thanks, Sam... I'll be calling the number later this week to find out if I can rent the billboard right beside it... we can have SWG and Brier Patch URLs posted with it... heh... that should cause a real stink...

posted by: Eric on April 25, 2004 08:03 PM

No, I fully understand where you're coming from Eric. I wasn't meaning to try and dispute your opinion; just offer a different view. I spent many nights on the porch waiting for my dates to pick me up so that I wouldn't smell like smoke from my parent's habit. LOL. I'm sure that you don't smell bad; I know a few people that you wouldn't know they smoked at all unless you saw them do it. :) You are right, though, in that while the message they were trying to send is clear, they're choice of getting their point across was tasteless. And don't apologize; you didn't offend me at all. :)

posted by: Asherah on April 25, 2004 08:42 PM

Eric...Go for it!!!

posted by: Sam on April 25, 2004 09:26 PM

Insights has a URL as well as cigarettes!! Count me in. I'd never recommend anyone START smoking, but it should be their informed choice - not a guilt-induced decision. And personally, I agree with you on the hippies, Eric. I'd much rather smell tobacco than mj.

posted by: Indigo on April 26, 2004 01:00 AM

Count me in for a little help. Social nazis are a true pain in the rear.

posted by: gunner on April 26, 2004 01:53 AM

I am a former smoker, and I feel the same way you do. I will NEVER nag anyone, including my husband, to stop smoking cigarettes. He is an adult, and is entitled to make up his own mind. I smoked for 17 years, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. As far as an odor goes, smokers don't stink. They just smell like cigarettes. Some folks just don't use their smellers right!!

posted by: Denise on April 26, 2004 02:58 AM

Now Eric... In all honesty, you've got to admit you hair, clothes and breath are NOT the sweetest smelling right after you've smokek.

So a PROPER comeback billboard would be something like "Milk-drinkers have rancid breath," or "Meat-eaters have blobs of cholesterol meandering throughout their bloodstream," or "Non-deoderant wearing hippies have smelly pits."

Ok, granted, none of my ideas are as concise as the one you saw. But at least they are all TRUE (to the same degree "Smokers Stink" is).

That having been said, I'm wondering if I brushed my teeth again after I drank that glass of milk this morning.


posted by: Nee on April 26, 2004 09:19 AM

You paid for that billboard. What do you think they are doing with the money they extorted from big tobacco?


posted by: recondo32 on April 29, 2004 12:30 PM